


Silence and Callousness

by Kitt_Monroe



Category: Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Gen, Spoilers for Chapters 1 2 and 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-29
Updated: 2014-05-29
Packaged: 2018-01-27 01:16:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1709663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitt_Monroe/pseuds/Kitt_Monroe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's still trying to figure out what that really means.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Silence and Callousness

There was a small sound, somewhat irritating. Most sounds irritated him, but this one was particularly grating at the moment. Not probably because it was especially more obnoxious than most other sounds, but because he just was not in the mood for hearing anything right now. Hearing sounds meant he had to acknowledge that there were material objects surrounding him that were able to make sound, which meant he had to recognize the existence of a full material world in which he was currently lying on his back, doing nothing, when he should be making an effort to spend his time in some way even remotely more productive. If he could only pretend that no such world existed, that he was lying on his back in some place more mystical, farther somehow from his current reality, somehow removed from that material world, he might be able to escape the knowledge that he was supposed to be contributing something to his current situation and not lying, mummified in a sea of covers, on one of the world's sixteen thinnest beds, avoiding anyone and anything that might present to him the task of exerting what little mental energy he had.

And yet, despite his willing the faucet in his bathroom to shut by itself, it continued to make that horrendous dripping noise. It was relentless; it would not cease no matter what incantation he intoned, what threat he levied, or what prayer he raised in his attempt to summon peace and quiet to his cottage. So now he had to come with an excuse for why his sorcery was not working at this time. He figured he could make up that the wool in one of his blankets was a detriment to his magical abilities--otherwise, obviously, he would have been able to handle something as insignificant as a sink faucet with ease.

He suddenly remembered that nobody else was in the room, and he didn't actually have to explain to anybody why he couldn't turn off the faucet. He had just sort of gotten used to inventing convenient reasons why he hadn't succeeded in something that required magic or the use of the mystical arts. Usually his excuses went along the lines of it wasn't the right moment to unleash his true power or he knew his classmates would go into catatonic states from the awe of witnessing his work--but he knew those had gotten old by now, so he had to think of new reasons, most recently his brilliant wool-is-my-weakness idea. Nice one, Tanaka. Real convincing.

He was aware that he didn't have magic powers. He knew that his hamsters were not gods (and if they were, they certainly weren't _dark_ gods, no they were far too precious and perfect to dabble in the dark arts), and he realized that he sounded like a lunatic when he talked as though those among other ridiculous things were true. Maybe if he gave the impression, just once in a while, that he was just joking around and that his tall dark and obnoxious persona was just a character he liked to play, maybe his classmates would go "oh, so he's not actually crazy, he's just a silly guy who likes hamsters." And maybe they would avoid him less, 'cause who doesn't like a silly guy who likes hamsters?

The saddest part was he actually _was_ that exact same silly guy. It just felt so impossible for him to show them that. If he did, they would know that he was a normal human being and so he would be required to socialize with them like normal human beings do, and it was that right there that made it so hard. He was pretty sure at least a few of them had figured him out in this respect--his isolating himself from other people wasn't entirely by choice, he just had no social skills whatsoever. Hinata, in particular, had showed signs that he knew Tanaka wasn't all that, like when the girls had been going to have their beach party or whatever, and Hinata had mentioned it to Tanaka and what did Tanaka say? Did he say something an actual person would say in that situation?

No, why would he have. Before he even thought about it he had said something he knew was ridiculous and included the phrase "silence and callousness." What that even actually meant was Tanaka's guess as much as it was Hinata's, but as Hinata and Souda had retreated toward the beach Tanaka could have sworn he heard Hinata mumble something to Souda about how if Tanaka wanted them to invite him to the party he could just ask.

But seriously, what was "silence and callousness" even supposed to mean? He had given that a lot of thought since uttering it and he still wasn't entirely sure.

He knew he could have just asked to go to the party. He knew he could do a lot of things normally that he couldn't bring himself to do. It was just so idiotically difficult for him to let his guard down. He would receive a compliment on something interesting he had said, or some admirable gesture he had made, and without even thinking he would respond in the most condescending and pompous imaginable way. He couldn't stop himself, because if he thought too deeply about it and tried to respond kindly, normally, like somebody who wasn't delusional and/or a douche, he would probably end up revealing to everyone that he was a normal person and, as mentioned previously, he would end up having to act like one.

And really, that would probably be good for him, once he got used to it, but there would be that gap, probably a couple weeks long, where he would be asked to demonstrate social skills he didn't have, until he finally got the hang of hanging out with other people. And that was going to be a painful gap, and it was going to suck.

It wasn't even as though he could be sure he had two weeks to spare learning to socialize. He could be murdered during those two weeks, or--God forbid--he could seriously fuck up and kill someone. (That would have to be an accident, though, right?) He talked a big game about how he was a) immortal, b) too powerful for anyone to even think of killing him, or both, but the reality was that he had every bit of the same chance of dying in this situation as anybody else.

Add that to the list of things he knew that he pretended not to.

It all conspired to ensure that his relationships with the others were constantly strained, which he recognized was a really bad position to be in when the objective on this island was to murder someone. If he didn't have good relationships with his classmates, how could he expect not to be killed? He was sure everybody here liked to think it would never be their body the others found. He felt the exact same way. If anyone did get killed that was just them being stupid, he told himself. But he could never be that dumb.

But obviously, Togami and Koizumi and Mioda and Saionji had all thought that same thing, why wouldn't they? Up until they each got into the precise situation where they were murdered, each of them had probably always figured they'd come out of this alive, that no one could possibly want to or be able to murder them. And look what had become of them.

So he knew it behooved him to try to make friends. In fact, some of his remaining classmates seemed already willing to be his friends if only he could improve his attitude: Sonia seemed to always have something friendly to say to him (or sometimes to his hamsters, which had confused him at first but was a surprisingly validating experience), and Souda, while not exactly having _nice_ things to say to him, seemed okay with talking to him for extended periods of time. It would be so easy to insinuate himself into a group with the two of them, but all those worries and uncertainties kept him from trying every time he thought about it.

Besides, it was clear that Souda had a thing for Sonia (he wasn't even subtle), and Tanaka didn't like to be too self-absorbed (of course he acted like he did around everyone else, but truthfully he didn't), but he kept getting the impression that Sonia liked Tanaka a bit. And Tanaka definitely didn't want to irritate Souda by making himself part of a group with them.

...So yeah, that was going to stand as his excuse for not making friends with them. Of course, he desperately _did_ want to have them (anybody, really, but those two seemed most convenient/easiest to befriend) as companions, but the excuse came so smoothly. He couldn't ignore the excuse.

Suddenly he realized it was quiet. He sat up in his bed, hearing his joints creak as if he were a ninety-year-old man who hadn't walked in decades, and looked to the left to peer into his washroom. The faucet was no longer dripping, why exactly was that...?

Mirage Silver Falcon Jum-P came scurrying out of the washroom and across the floor toward Tanaka's bed. With a nimbleness and agility that was impressive even for his species, the rodent climbed one of the bedposts and tumbled over the sea of covers until he reached Tanaka's outstretched hand.

Tanaka looked between Jum-P and the washroom. "Did you turn off the sink...?" he inquired. He knew Jum-P couldn't really understand anything he had said, but he always got the feeling his hamsters could tell what he meant about most things.

Jum-P merely snuggled up against Tanaka's palm in response. "You're so smart," Tanaka cooed, gently stroking his neck fur.

This was the kind of thing he would love to be known for. The principle was sound--a Super High-school Level Animal Breeder being known as the guy who likes animals? Somehow it made a lot more sense than being known as the weird, dark guy who says things like "God favors Gundam Tanaka alone!"

It would be nice, anyway. But until he could find the courage to let this side of him see the light of day, he had to content himself with figuring out what "silence and callousness" meant, and pretending he thought his hamsters were dark gods of destruction.

"Of course they're not," he mumbled to himself, "look at this little guy, he's too cute to be a god."


End file.
